Random Thoughts

Why are things not permanent..well at least some things..The present set of people you know..give 5 years time..only a handful of them will be with you sharing the same laugh..the same drinks..the same conversations that you share today...sometimes even when everyone is around you...in reality no one is around..no one whom you can call your own..someone to share out those inner most feelings that you had kept safely hidden from all eyes to pry upon..

For a guy like me,people see the laugh..the smiles..the parties..the adventure..but no one see's the tears..the hollowness..behind that same face. When we were children..the world was so colorful..everything was one more..one more chocolate..one more game..one more toy..one more movie..things were either meant to be or not..complications were little..girls and boys were friends (not the one with benefits but the one you can count upon).

School ended and the vices of this world creeps in..more freedom..more fun but in a way you never imagined before..Girlfriends..parties..and what not..drinks took the place of soft drinks..cigarette took the place of candies..sex took the place of hugs..and as they say life got fucked up..

Sometimes in life in midst of all the crazy shit..one day you sit back and contemplate..things you could have changed..words you could have taken aback..studied a bit more..made life a bit worthwhile..but then you realize you have no one by your side..

maybe its the drink that make me write shits like this..but one thing terrifies me all through the night when i see a frail old man lying all alone on a bed..with no one by his side to mourn his death..and it makes me think..is that the way i want to leave...!!